"Want a beer?" I asked Omar from the kithcen. "Yeah, sure." He answered. "Okay." I said, and grabbed two before I joined him on the futon. "So, what is troubling your mind?" He asked. "I don't know what to do." I said. "Well, lets just start talking. Maybe we can figure something out." He said. "Okay." I told him, and took a drink of beer. "Do you love Simon?" He asked. "Yes. I do." I said, after a slight pause. "Do you love Luke?" He asked. "Yeah, but it's a different feeling." I told him. "How so?" He asked. "I don't know. Just different. I feel closer to Luke I guess." I told him. "Is it impossible to picture the two of you together?" "No. In fact it's really easy to." "But you aren't sure you want to?" He asked. "I'm not sure I want to give up on me and Simon. I love him. He's helped me through a lot. I can't picture ending things with him. And I really feel like this is my home now. I mean, I can't imagine moving back to Utah!" "He wont move out here?" "I don't know. I'm sure he would. But he'd be leaving behind The House." I told him. "You guys couldn't extend your business out here? Run both?" He asked. "I don't know. This is all so much to think about." I said, trying not to cry. "Hey, hey. Come on now, don't cry. You need to figure this out." He said. "I know. I can't help it!" I yelled. He scooted over and hugged me. "I mean, Luke had his chance. Many times, with me. But he always turned it down. Saying we just couldn't be together!" "Maybe he was scared." Omar said, still holding me. "Of what?" I asked. "The same thing you are scared of." He said. We talked for a really long time. About two hours later I decided I should call Luke. I said goodbye to Omar, then sat down on the futon to call Luke. I hesitated, and looked down at my bracelet from Charlie. I closed my eyes. "What do I do?" I asked, picturing Charlie. I started thinking of old times with the four of us friends together, and smiled. I took a deep breath and called Luke. "Hello?" Luke asked. He sounded really down. "Luke?" I asked. "Hey Robyn." He answered, confused. "You okay?" I asked. "I heard about you and Caleb." I told him. "How? I havn't told anyone yet." He said. "I know his sister down here remember? She kind of angrily made me leave her house this morning." "Really? I'm sorry." He said. "It's not your fault. Is it true?" I asked him. "What?" He asked. "Why you guys are taking time apart." "Yeah. Caleb said he's had enough of us all playing games and pretending like you and I don't want to be together." "Do you want to be with me?" I asked him. "I don't know. I love Caleb, but I feel so different about you. Like I just know you better. I feel something different with you." He said, and I laughed. "What?" HE asked. "I just said that about Simon to a friend of mine." I told him. "Really?" Luke asked. "Yeah, really." I said. Just then there was a knock on my door. I got up and looked in the peephole. Simon was out there. "Can I let you go. I will call you in a bit." I told Luke. "Yeah, sure. I'll be waiting." He said. I hung up, put my phone on the counter, then opened the door. "Hey." I said, and gave Simon a big hug. "Hey. Can we talk?" He asked. "Yeah, of course babe." I said, and he walked in. We both sat down on the couch, then he took my hands and made me face him. "Everything okay?" I asked him. He took a deep breath. "This is really hard." He said. "What is?" I asked him. "I don't think we should date anymore." He said, and my heart sank. "Why?" I asked, tearing up. "Robyn, I'm just a friend to you. I know you say you love me, but I can tell you mean as a friend, or a brother. I can hear it in your voice." He said. I just shook my head. "No, it's true. I care about you a lot, and I know you care about me, but it just isn't meant to be. I think you know that." He said. "How do you know what I do and don't mean?" I asked him. "Because I heard you tell Luke you loved him before you left. It sounded different when you told him. That's when I figured it out. Robyn, this is really hard for me to do." He said. I wiped my eyes. "I know. I understand." I told him. "I still want to be your friend." he said, and smiled. I smiled back. "Want me to leave?" He asked. I shook my head yes. He gave me a big hug. "I'll call you tomorrow, okay?" He said. "Okay." I said, trying really hard to hold my tears in. "Bye." He said, and then walked out. I started to cry really hard. I got up and walked back over to my phone and called Luke. I was crying when he answered. "Robyn? What's wrong?" Luke asked, really concerned. "Simon just broke up with me." I told him. "What? Why?" He asked. "I guess he felt we weren't meant for each other. That we were more close friends then a couple." I explained. "Are you okay?" Luke asked. "No. This hurts worse then I thought it would." I told him. "God, I should be there right now!" Luke said, sounding kind of angry. "It's okay." I told him. "No it's not! You are upset and your best frend is a couple hundred miles away." He said. "Luke, I'm fine!" I said. "No you aren't. Just like I'm not. What the fuck is wrong with us?" He asked. "We are idiots." I told him. "Robyn, I'm flying out." He said. "No, you don't have to do that." I said. "I want to." He said. "But Caleb is gonna be here. Do you really want to run into him out here?" I asked. "I don't care. I just want to see you." Luke said. "Really?" I asked. "More then I've ever wanted to see anyone." He said, and I started crying. "I'll get the first flight out." He said. I could hear him typing in the back ground. "10:00. I'm booked." He said. "Okay. I'll pick you up." I told him. "Okay." He said. "Bye." I told him. "Bye." He said, and we hung up.
I was shaking the whole way to the airport. It was really late too, and I was trying not to cry. I got there, after what seemed like an eternity and waited for Luke's flight to get in. I couldn't believe I was nervous! I wated by the luggage claim, and watched as a large group of people started filing through two small doors to pick up their luggage. I looked around for Luke, but didn't see him. I started to get anxious when the crowd started thinning and didn't see him. I figured that must have been another flight. I sighed and continued waiting. That happend two more times with large groups of people. I looked at my phone to check the time. He should have been there by now. I sighed, and when I looked up I saw Luke walking towards me. "LUKE!" I shouted, and ran over to him. He dropped his bag, and hugged me. I started crying and kissing him. He kissed me back and felt the closeness between us. I know this was how it was suposed to be. I stopped, and looked at him. "Hey." He said. "Hey." I answered. We just smiled at each other and walked over to get his other bag. After we got it, we walked out to my car and drove silently home. We got to my place, and he dropped his bags right away, Picked me up and carried me over to the futon. I laughed, and he set me down. I pulled his shirt, so he fell fowared and sat down next to me. "So?" I asked him. "So what?" He asked. "So, what does this mean?" I asked him, and felt my eyes tear up. "I think this means we've fought this for too long." He said, and I smiled. I pushed him back, climbed on his lap and kissed him. "I love you." I whispered. "I love you too." He said.
1 Comments:
"Want a beer?" I asked Omar from the kithcen.
"Yeah, sure." He answered.
"Okay." I said, and grabbed two before I joined him on the futon.
"So, what is troubling your mind?" He asked.
"I don't know what to do." I said.
"Well, lets just start talking. Maybe we can figure something out." He said.
"Okay." I told him, and took a drink of beer.
"Do you love Simon?" He asked.
"Yes. I do." I said, after a slight pause.
"Do you love Luke?" He asked.
"Yeah, but it's a different feeling." I told him.
"How so?" He asked.
"I don't know. Just different. I feel closer to Luke I guess." I told him.
"Is it impossible to picture the two of you together?"
"No. In fact it's really easy to."
"But you aren't sure you want to?" He asked.
"I'm not sure I want to give up on me and Simon. I love him. He's helped me through a lot. I can't picture ending things with him. And I really feel like this is my home now. I mean, I can't imagine moving back to Utah!"
"He wont move out here?"
"I don't know. I'm sure he would. But he'd be leaving behind The House." I told him.
"You guys couldn't extend your business out here? Run both?" He asked.
"I don't know. This is all so much to think about." I said, trying not to cry.
"Hey, hey. Come on now, don't cry. You need to figure this out." He said.
"I know. I can't help it!" I yelled. He scooted over and hugged me. "I mean, Luke had his chance. Many times, with me. But he always turned it down. Saying we just couldn't be together!"
"Maybe he was scared." Omar said, still holding me.
"Of what?" I asked.
"The same thing you are scared of." He said.
We talked for a really long time. About two hours later I decided I should call Luke. I said goodbye to Omar, then sat down on the futon to call Luke. I hesitated, and looked down at my bracelet from Charlie. I closed my eyes.
"What do I do?" I asked, picturing Charlie. I started thinking of old times with the four of us friends together, and smiled. I took a deep breath and called Luke.
"Hello?" Luke asked. He sounded really down.
"Luke?" I asked.
"Hey Robyn." He answered, confused.
"You okay?" I asked. "I heard about you and Caleb." I told him.
"How? I havn't told anyone yet." He said.
"I know his sister down here remember? She kind of angrily made me leave her house this morning."
"Really? I'm sorry." He said.
"It's not your fault. Is it true?" I asked him.
"What?" He asked.
"Why you guys are taking time apart."
"Yeah. Caleb said he's had enough of us all playing games and pretending like you and I don't want to be together."
"Do you want to be with me?" I asked him.
"I don't know. I love Caleb, but I feel so different about you. Like I just know you better. I feel something different with you." He said, and I laughed.
"What?" HE asked.
"I just said that about Simon to a friend of mine." I told him.
"Really?" Luke asked.
"Yeah, really." I said. Just then there was a knock on my door.
I got up and looked in the peephole. Simon was out there.
"Can I let you go. I will call you in a bit." I told Luke.
"Yeah, sure. I'll be waiting." He said. I hung up, put my phone on the counter, then opened the door.
"Hey." I said, and gave Simon a big hug.
"Hey. Can we talk?" He asked.
"Yeah, of course babe." I said, and he walked in. We both sat down on the couch, then he took my hands and made me face him.
"Everything okay?" I asked him. He took a deep breath.
"This is really hard." He said.
"What is?" I asked him.
"I don't think we should date anymore." He said, and my heart sank.
"Why?" I asked, tearing up.
"Robyn, I'm just a friend to you. I know you say you love me, but I can tell you mean as a friend, or a brother. I can hear it in your voice." He said. I just shook my head.
"No, it's true. I care about you a lot, and I know you care about me, but it just isn't meant to be. I think you know that." He said.
"How do you know what I do and don't mean?" I asked him.
"Because I heard you tell Luke you loved him before you left. It sounded different when you told him. That's when I figured it out. Robyn, this is really hard for me to do." He said. I wiped my eyes.
"I know. I understand." I told him.
"I still want to be your friend." he said, and smiled. I smiled back.
"Want me to leave?" He asked. I shook my head yes. He gave me a big hug.
"I'll call you tomorrow, okay?" He said.
"Okay." I said, trying really hard to hold my tears in.
"Bye." He said, and then walked out. I started to cry really hard. I got up and walked back over to my phone and called Luke. I was crying when he answered.
"Robyn? What's wrong?" Luke asked, really concerned.
"Simon just broke up with me." I told him.
"What? Why?" He asked.
"I guess he felt we weren't meant for each other. That we were more close friends then a couple." I explained.
"Are you okay?" Luke asked.
"No. This hurts worse then I thought it would." I told him.
"God, I should be there right now!" Luke said, sounding kind of angry.
"It's okay." I told him.
"No it's not! You are upset and your best frend is a couple hundred miles away." He said.
"Luke, I'm fine!" I said.
"No you aren't. Just like I'm not. What the fuck is wrong with us?" He asked.
"We are idiots." I told him.
"Robyn, I'm flying out." He said.
"No, you don't have to do that." I said.
"I want to." He said.
"But Caleb is gonna be here. Do you really want to run into him out here?" I asked.
"I don't care. I just want to see you." Luke said.
"Really?" I asked.
"More then I've ever wanted to see anyone." He said, and I started crying.
"I'll get the first flight out." He said. I could hear him typing in the back ground.
"10:00. I'm booked." He said.
"Okay. I'll pick you up." I told him.
"Okay." He said.
"Bye." I told him.
"Bye." He said, and we hung up.
I was shaking the whole way to the airport. It was really late too, and I was trying not to cry. I got there, after what seemed like an eternity and waited for Luke's flight to get in. I couldn't believe I was nervous! I wated by the luggage claim, and watched as a large group of people started filing through two small doors to pick up their luggage. I looked around for Luke, but didn't see him. I started to get anxious when the crowd started thinning and didn't see him. I figured that must have been another flight. I sighed and continued waiting. That happend two more times with large groups of people. I looked at my phone to check the time. He should have been there by now. I sighed, and when I looked up I saw Luke walking towards me.
"LUKE!" I shouted, and ran over to him. He dropped his bag, and hugged me. I started crying and kissing him. He kissed me back and felt the closeness between us. I know this was how it was suposed to be. I stopped, and looked at him.
"Hey." He said.
"Hey." I answered. We just smiled at each other and walked over to get his other bag. After we got it, we walked out to my car and drove silently home. We got to my place, and he dropped his bags right away, Picked me up and carried me over to the futon. I laughed, and he set me down. I pulled his shirt, so he fell fowared and sat down next to me.
"So?" I asked him.
"So what?" He asked.
"So, what does this mean?" I asked him, and felt my eyes tear up.
"I think this means we've fought this for too long." He said, and I smiled. I pushed him back, climbed on his lap and kissed him.
"I love you." I whispered.
"I love you too." He said.
Post a Comment
<< Home